Oh Cabby

With the sheer volume of top class rugby going on, it is understandable if one were to get a little distracted from other important issues. No, I'm not talking about work and school or Israel but rather perhaps what Craig Davidson is doing with himself these days or whether Sean Fitzpatrick has been murdered yet. One particular individual who many of you must battle to get out of your thoughts and prayers is Cabous van der Westhuizen. He is alive, yes. Well in a sort of 'oh my god look honey its Keith Richards' sort of alive. His status amongst the living shouldn't however spare Cabby from your prayers and he could in fact probably use a bit more your well-wishing.

Cabous was born in Cape Town in 1965 (no, not 1695) and upon birth was immediately mistaken for either a withered tobacco leaf or Benjamin Button. After studying in Stellenbosch he was signed up by what was then the Transvaal Lions for whom he galloped around on 40 occasions. In 1992 Cabby moved to Durban to play for the Sharks. He was a truly scrumptious try-scorer and amassed a monumental 90 tries in 128 games for the Durban outfit. Cabby still holds the Sharks' records for the most career tries, most tries in a season (28), most tries in a Currie Cup season (13) and most tries in a match (4). 

No mere Currie Cup player was Cabous, who actually played 16 games for the Springboks but was not included in the winning 1995 World Cup squad. Cabby is unable to recall the World Cup without shedding a few tears. This does, however have nothing to do with the Springboks winning or the late Nelson Mandela's emotive heroics, nor even due to the travesty that was 'Invictus' but rather because it was Pieter Hendriks and not he who was able to throw down against the Canadians with 'Bullet' Dalton.

Cabby's career ended in 1999 and will be remembered by Sharks' players since for being one of the pioneers of the idea that every retired Natal player should open a restaurant in Umhlanga. Cabby decided that a sushi spot was a good idea for an Afrikaner from the Cape and he wasn't wrong with both "SoSushi" and "Sumo's Sushi Bar" proving big hits in Durban (which is really like saying that the Fourways Keg is big in uh Fourways). The confines of Durban proved too much for the transient Cabous who decided that in 2008, Mauritius was the place for him. I have it on first hand evidence that Cabous just oozes crusty beach vibes. Apparently your car will get less salt damage parked in the sea itself than near Cabous.

In Mauritius, Cabby is the proud owner of the Beach House Restaurant and Bar and supposedly lives off a combination of rum and underage tourists. Cabby does give back to the local community and is involved with a local rugby club called the Northern Pirates. He is also a member of the Anti-Drug Squad in Grand Bay but I get the impression that the organisation is something of a misnomer.

Cabous is on the left (fair mistake to think Paul Sprenger
[right] matches the description above)

In all seriousness, Cabby does appear to be a very likeable guy and any sour grapes come from behind a desk in Sandton knowing that he is probably limboing his hips away at this very moment with a coconut in one hand and whatever is foolish enough to get close in the other. It must be said; one cannot think about Cabous without drifting off with a smile on one's face to a simpler time where long-haired wings didn't just come Australia and of a player that was all wheels and gees who personified nineties Natal rugby.

Cheers Cabby. You are the best.

References include: www.mauritius-expatriate.blogspot.com, www.supersport.com, www.imademostofthisup.org  

Super Rugby Form XV

As the round-robin stage of Super Rugby nears its end, it's time to have a look at which players have stood up and performed the best in their respective position. The rules for selection are that a player will be considered for the position in which he has appeared this season and not where he could possibly fit. That will eradicate the chance of putting Bismarck at centre or Francois Steyn at prop much to all of your disappointment I'm sure.

Looshead Prop: Scott Sio and Pek Cowan have been solid for the Brumbies and Force, respectively as has Wyatt Crockett for the 'Saders but my pick here goes to the Beast. Tendai has been mightily impressive this year in the scrum and in the loose and has sometimes even tried to get across the advantage line rather than just fall over when he gets there.

Hooker: Dane Coles and Adriaan Strauss pop up as contenders but neither have had consistently stellar years in 2014. Unfortunately for any perception of bias people may hold for me, the winner just has to be Bismarck du Plessis. Sure he is abrasive and a little petulant at times but he is the best hooker in the world and has been in this year's Super Rugby competition.

Tighthead Prop:  Pat Cilliers. Before you click away, I am joking. Charlie Faumuina has been top for the Blues but Kieran Longbottom has been a quiet and effective performer for what has been a delightful season for the Force. They aren't coming last.

Locks: There have been a number of exciting new bean poles in Super Rugby this year with Stephan Lewies and Patrick Tuipolotu both earning international call-ups. Sam Whitelock and Brodie Retalick have been great and Will Skelton has added serious muscle to the 'Tahs but it's his team mate good old rumbling tumbling doesn't usually do much of anything Kane Douglas and fellow Aussie, Luke Jones of the Rebels who get my picks.

Flanks: There has been no shortage of top performing loosies this season with the likes of Lappies Labuschagne, Faifili Levave and Peter Saili putting in good shifts for their teams at blind side but my number 6 (blindside flank for the rest of the world except South Africa bizarrely) is the much-maligned Dave Dennis of the Waratahs. On the openside it just has to be Michael Hooper. Jack Lam has stepped up in the face of the challenge that is Ardie Savea and Jaco Kriel and Heinrich Brussow have been real menschen but Hooper has been the best of the lot.

Number Eight: If it weren't for injury-enforced absence, Kieran Read would have this spot nailed but Jerome Kaino has been nothing short of impossible to deal with since his return for the Blues. JK is a tremendous athlete and is looking good to reclaim his starting All Black spot, although he will probably revert to the side of the scrum. He is to play Bane is the next batman movie.

Scrumhalf: Cobus Reinach has been great for the Sharks and will be disappointed to have been overlooked by Heyneke Meyer. Aaron Smith has been good for the Highlanders as has Nic White for the Brumbies but my pick goes to new boy Faf de Klerk. He has shown mighty enthusiasm and quality for the Lions this year and he looks like Nico Rosberg.

Flyhalf: Another Lion, Marnitz Boshoff arrived with a real bang this season and has taken over Morne Steyn's role as the drop-kicking bitch. Colin Slade has played well but the fight is between Beauden Barrett and Bernard Foley. Barrett takes it over the Foley for me as Beauden has offered more of a rounded game.

Centres: I'm quite certain that I am not the only one who has had Damian de Allende and Malakai Fekitoa in his fantasy side for the majority of the season and although their inclusion may have been initially due to cost, they have earned their spots with brilliant performances both deserving of international call-ups. Honourable mentions include Ryan Crotty, Ma'a Nonu and Jan Serfontein. Oh and lest we forget Waylon Murray who is apparently at the Bulls.

Wings: Julian Savea is the number 11. No doubts there. Jonny McNichol has crossed over for a few good tries, Charles Piutau was looking deadly prior to injury, Willie le Roux has had a very good year and Lolagi Visinia has been exciting in recent weeks but my prize goes to Mr Tumnus himself: Richard Buckman for his tireless and fruitful performances for the Highlanders.

Fullback: This is tougher to call than a blind man having a dig at Quizup. If I were Steve Hansen, I'd just chuck Ben Smith on the wing but rules are rules and he has to compete with Israel Folau for the fullback spot. Issy has had his injuries which should rule him out but he has been truly indomitable when he has featured. Ben Smith is class and there are no doubts there but Folau is a phenom of Sonny-Bill's ilk and he takes the cake and eats it. Jason Woodward deserves a mention but unfortunately he is competing with the best.

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Who be the new DC?

New Zealand rugby, despite its enormous success over the last, well ever, has had its fair share of issues. 2011 marked a pivotal moment in their history as they finally broke their World Cup hoodoo pipping the (we're comfortable with our sexuality) French in a helluva tense final. Prior to that, though, there was an air of vulnerability mixed in with their imposing aura. One area where the All Blacks have been oh so steady, however is at the position of fly half. Funny that Dan Carter didn't actually feature for the majority of the World Cup with Stephen Donald arriving to finish the job after being interrupted from his morning session with his favourite sheep Fiona to knock over the winning penalty wearing Frodo Baggins' replica All Black jersey. DC has been the best number 10 in world rugby for ages and although he hasn't actually retired he isn’t currently available.

The question remains as to who is the next All Black starting pivot? Aside from France, most international sides aim to decide on one player to have the role with the obvious room for maneuvering if things don't work out. The Frogs, as is their style, adopt a different approach flitting between number 10s like David Moyes' mind about whether there is indeed light at the end his nightmarish Manchester tunnel. The All Blacks, as is the unfortunate nature of their incredible depth, have a number of strong candidates for the role.

Aaron Cruden probably entered Super Rugby this season as the favourite for the spot. If anyone, he was the incumbent but would have known that a challenge stiffer than Andy Murray's mom's lip would come from Beauden Barrett. Cruden suffered a big set-back due to injury and his return to the Chiefs couldn’t have come at a worse time. The Chiefs have slumped badly in recent weeks. Their playoff hopes remain alive by virtue of the fact that the international window is upon us allowing Dave Rennie to rally his troops but where the team benefits from timing, its All Black hopefuls do not. Cruden is not the only Chief left pondering his chances of making the starting 15 with Liam Messam, Sam Cane and Tawera Kerr-Barlow coming off sub-par form.

Beauden Barrett has been sensational this season. He has improved the consistency of his general play and his kicking, both out of hand and from the tee is basically beyond reproach. Cruden has more experience for the All Blacks and is a truly talented player but I would expect Beaudy to get the nod for the first test against England this coming weekend over Cruden and the resurgent Colin Slade.